sQUISH sAYS...

newish:

RussDraper: I'll have a donut and orange juice please.

SquishToGo: I'm sorry.  You can only order me.

"did you just say TEN!?"

-squish to justin, oblivious to frisbee stall count

"i'll have my people call your people then... something nasty, like a bunch of bigotted right-wing homophobic pricks."

"when i grow up, i want to be aaron carter!"

"Fortunately, no one will ever have to worry about me ever again, because I've decided to put a bullet through my head right now and put myself out of my happiness, thus putting everyone else out of their misery.  It's a profitable trade-off on the whole, and at least I go down a martyr."

"If you're not born cute, there's no point in bein' born at all.  Just go crawl back in the womb and die and come back out a stillborn.  The world doesn't need ya."

"Remember, don't discuss any of this through email or unsecured connections.  And don't pray about it.  God could be listening."

"I know boston like the inside of my uterus!"

"Let all the fiery demons and ministers of evil everywhere turn to icicles and shatter from the eternal white frost that has now blanketed all of hell."

squish4dummies: it probably has something to do with me being one of the first users set up... ?

RussDraper: Hehe

squish4dummies: why's that funny

RussDraper: I dont know

squish4dummies: haha, well, you laughed at it, you should know why you laughed=)

squish4dummies: you didn't type "hehe" for nothing=)

RussDraper: I think that you in general are just funny

squish4dummies: and so you laugh whenever you feel like it around me, even when i'm not saying anything comical?  wow, that's like having a powerful mystic empathic aura of humor around me wherever i go.  trippy.

RussDraper: haha

"That I'm worried is the least of my concerns."

"i put myself on my own AIM list so i'll always have someone to talk to."

"If life gives you lemons and limes, shove them back up life's ass and demand some lemon-lime sprite instead! Just make sure to rinse the metaphorical shit off the can before you drink it."


oldish:

"Stop bitching, I call ALL my bitches bitch, bitch!"

"Life is only playdough for the gods."

"Eegads, Molly, his head's off! but no matter, the giant man-eating swamp lizard that's creeping up behind us would have killed him soon anyway...."

"have you ever wondered what it's like to be a banana? i mean REALLY wondered? no, i mean, have you ever sat there staring at one for weeks trying to imagine what it was feeling, and gone through hypnotism to try to experience believing you're a banana? have you ever spent months researching the cellular structure of the banana, comparing and contrasting charts and diagrams of it to endless human brainwave activity charts and graphs, desperately hoping to find the critical connection that would prove that bananas are the second smartest species on the planet, and not dolphins? have you ever REALLY wondered??..."

> always,
> josh
"are you sure? are you REALLY always you? or is someone else you sometimes? perhaps you're always someone else, and elizabeth hurley is really you..."

[to kornflake]: "I thought of you as i was mowing the lawn today. I tried to imagine what
you'd be like giving birth. I don't know if that's good or bad."

"You really have no choice but to look forward to the rest of your life. 'Cause after all, the rest of your life's in FRONT of you, and when something's in front of you, you can't exactly look at it sideways or backwards. Unless you're someone who doesn't look at all, in which case you probably go through life like a hamster in one of those balls who crashes into something every ten seconds and has to turn around. That's also a very unsanitary way to go through life, cause whenever you take a dump you have to step all over your own shit until someone cleans your ball out."

"Did you hear about the man who tried to juggle fourteen balls and balance a tricicle on his head while jumping out of an airplane without a parashoot? He died."

"Too much in my head; I think it's ready to explode. Sometimes, I really wish it would, cause then I'd pick up all the pieces and put them all together, and maybe then it'd all make sense..."